Incy Wincy

I'm afraid this post doesn't have a picture to alleviate you from the visual banality of lines and lines of text, but for good reason I might add, you'll thank me for it, honestly you will.

Over the past 3 weeks we seemed to have had an influx of the eight-legged variety. It started off with each tomato plant harboring one, just little ones. I let them be for a while and now I've decided to start killing them all because I don't want to pick my tomatoes incase I have a spider crawl all over me! I've become quite a dab hand and squishing them with the snail picker which I might add must be the purchase of the century, multiple usage implement now.

So, the little ones by the tomatoes, yep, they've gone but the ones we're seeing in the garden now, they're very gradually, day by day getting bigger and bigger. Obviously they're coming from our shed, the darkest, web ridden place on earth, it's the Greenwich equivalent of a 2000ft deep cave in Borneo, probably...

So these big ladeez have been hiding in the shed all year and now they've done their hair, put on some lippy and are out and about parading themsevles for Mr.Spider. I don't like it. I don't like it one little bit.

And isn't it strange that the bigger a spider gets, the more freaked out you are about squishing it, as though it's going to turn round and start reasoning with you about the merits of an arachnid killing spree. I can see it's point, it's not like it's going to solve the worlds problems, Isreal and Palestine are not suddenly going to become best friends because there's no spiders left in the world, it's a silly thought and one not worth pursuing in the slightest. But ah-ha, then again, there's nothing like a common goal to get the peace process going...

Actually, I'm abit of wimp, I'm just gonna leave it there and hope it goes away! Or maybe I'll just throw lots of little bits of dirt into it's web so it runs around after them all and dies of exhaustion. Now that would be evil. MwahahahahahahHAHAHAH!